Book of Big Daddy of the Deep Pockets
Chapter 1
1 It came to pass that Jesus H. was invited to speak at a dinner
in the house of Big Daddy where servants served red and white wine along with all
manner of lavish foods. He left his
disciple behind saying “only those donating $50,000 a plate to Big Daddy’s
politician friend may dine at Big Daddy’s tonight. 2 Eat some bread and drink that 2 buck chuck
and remember me.”
3 As dessert was being served Big Daddy asked, “you there,
Jesus H., which political party should I contribute my hard earned money to.”
4 Jesus H. replied, “consider the fisherman, is it not better
the drop lines on either side of the boat in order to find the fish that are
biting no matter which side of the boat they are biting on.”
5 Big Daddy thought on this for a bit and then said, “but
Jesus H., one party is more favorable to the rich, should I not cast my lot
with them.”
6 Jesus H. replied “consider the sheep herder. When it comes time to shear the flock, does
the herder choose sheep from only one side of the coral? No I say. 7 The herder chooses sheep from both sides of the corral to fleece. In this way his reward is twofold.”
8 “But Jesus H.” Big Daddy said “there are campaign
contribution limit laws. I need to
wisely pick the politicians I back.”
9 Taking a sip of the excellent dessert wine Jesus H. turned
to the gathered guests and said “oh ye of little faith and vision, 10 stacketh the supreme court with justices who
will overturn campaign finance law.
Bring cases before the court so that the justices can nullify decades of
campaign law and precedents. I say unto
you, 11 money is free speech. 12 Forget not as the prophet Romney spake 'Corporations are people, my friend.'”
13 After requesting a wine refill, Jesus H. reminded those
gathered “contributions to religious charities are tax deductible. 14 Forgeteth me not in your giving.”
-----------------
Context:
No comments:
Post a Comment